i can’t #tweetyour16yearoldself

I can’t Twitter this, because I have way more things to tell my 16 year old self than I can list in 140 characters, like everyone else is on Twitter today. But if I had to tell my 16 year old self a few things, it’d go a little like this:

  • Be decent to your little brother. Yeah, he’s an annoying little a-hole at 13 years old, but it’s just because he’s 13.
  • Don’t listen to your guidance counselor. She has plans for you that don’t at all match your plans. Don’t let her trick you into taking classes you don’t need!
  • You don’t have to feel bad about not wanting to go to dances. Ten years from now, everyone’s going to make fun of the douchey dresses all the girls wear.
  • Talk your dad into letting you practice driving a little more. That two miles to your grandparents that you’ve driven a billion times is going to cause you to fail your driver’s test. Twice.
  • Maybe drop Latin II and take Spanish for the next couple of years. Open book tests and watching your teacher smoke outside the door may seem like a good idea, but it will very likely never come up again. You’re only going to remember that agricola means farm, puer means boy, and homo means man.
  • If you quit pretending you twist your ankle during basketball practice just so you don’t have to run lines anymore, you’ll probably realize that you’re a pretty damn good baller!
  • You don’t need a boyfriend.
  • Basketball jerseys will ALWAYS be in fashion. You should wear them all the time.

Oh wait. I already knew that last one.

twitter updates for 2008-06-02

  • I’m so sleepy all of a sudden… Like fall asleep behind the wheel kind of sleepy. Early bedtime for me tonight! #
  • @rmcdonou congrats, rose!! #
  • Um, switching Twitter to protected for a while… Because I’m all secretive and shit, of course! #
  • It’s a very sad day today. I left my leftover hamburger helper at home. #
  • 1.5 hour meeting with my CEO this morning. I really love talking to her, especially about astrology. She hates hiring Leos! #

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twitter updates for 2008-06-01

  • On our way to get ya. be there soon #
  • Best fundraiser ever? Drag show/acoustic set from Sick of Sarah at a dyke bar. #
  • @best_day_ever did you check IN YOUR BUTT? #
  • Slamming a vodka red bull and then hiking up and down Grand Ave among hoards of people? Best way to spend a Sunday afternoon. #
  • I am so close to the stage that I might lick it. I love Doomtree!! #

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