pre-independence day list

This is the first 4th of July weekend I’ve remained in the Twin Cities since moving here. I’m usually in Milwaukee whooping it up at Summerfest. I was just talking to The General™, explaining how the first time we went to Summerfest must have been 2002. If my external hard drive was up and running, I’d absolutely post the picture that I have stuck in my head right now, where Rick was carrying Brooke down the streets of downtown Milwaukee while Derek and I laughed our asses off. And since then, there’s been two babies and a third one on the way, Derek’s gotten married, and holy crap, all of a sudden we’re complete grownups.

And speaking of complete grownups, I had fruit for lunch today, along with my peanut butter and strawberry preserves sandwich and Oatmeal Creme Pie. And by fruit, I mean an entire pint of watermelon. One of my job duties includes interviewing. Interviewing someone isn’t really something you should do after consuming that much fruit when your body hasn’t seen that much fruit in a very, very, very long time. I, honest to God, had to excuse myself mid-way through the interview so I could poop. I AM NOT KIDDING. I didn’t really say, “Excuse me, but I have to poop”, but it was still embarassing.

We have absolutely no plans this weekend at all. Like none. There’s a possible boxer meet up on Saturday (shut up! It’s nerdy, but awesome!) and a drag show later that evening that we’ve been talking about since we’re both in the midst of a BROMANCE with Johnny Lightning. And I have to go into work on Sunday for a couple of hours, but you know what makes up for that? The fact that I get to leave next Friday at least an hour early. Working until 6 p.m. usually isn’t that big of a deal. Except on Fridays. And then it sucks donkey balls.

I was just reminded that the Spam Jamboree is going on this weekend. I can’t explain it, but I have an unhealthy need to go. The idea of going to The General’s™ hometown is slightly daunting, but the idea of a 5K HOG JOG kinda makes up for it.


  1. I am laughing so hard at the poop story that I just spit water out through my nose!

    We’d love to see you tomorrow – Stop by if you get a chance. (You could poop there and everything!)

  2. Wait a sec…watermelon isn’t supposed to make you poop. It’s supposed to give you a boner. You got a raging boner from that pint o’ melon, didn’t you?

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