two dolla

What I would like to do right now is tell you in many, many, many words about how awesome my weekend in a hunting cabin located 190 miles away was. It would take hours. Plus, I have bruises to figure out tend to, one last search for any stowaway ticks, and a few things left to unpack.

I have training at work all of this week, and you all know how much I love training of any kind.

I just went flipping through all the pictures of this weekend, and I’m so glad I have some of the most awesome friends in the world. Aside from a bruised shin due to mounting a propane tank with no hands, a scraped knee from falling down the porch stairs while wearing fireman boots, and still trying to figure out if I did indeed really fall out of the top bunk onto the floor last night, it was a perfectly awesome weekend.

I leave you with some of my favorite pictures. The Flickr set from my camera is here. Other people are uploading theirs now, too, because I just looked at my Flickr contacts’ page and noticed three pictures of me from three different people, all with me wearing an orange hunter’s cap and insanely large sunglasses.

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1. My Favorite Mistake - Sheryl Crow
2. Misery - Pink
3. The Long and Winding Road - Beatles
4. 83 -  John Mayer
5. Photograph - Nickelback
6. When You Say You Love Me - Clay Aiken
7. Church of the Poison Mind - Culture Club
8. Bawitdaba - Kid Rock
9. All You Wanted - Michelle Branch
10. Tonight - New Kids on the Block

Needless to say the first three songs had me kind of worried with the pending drive to the camping building (that sounds more hardcore than cabin).

In any case, I should pack now. Clean clothes would be a neat thing to take. As long as they fit after the car’s been loaded with booze. I mean, uh, camping supplies.

This was the view from the roof last night.

The back of Jenni’s Mini pretty much explains this weekend.

Here’s me, Jenni, and Sean. We like rock hands.

I didn’t take any of mine off the camera, so you can see those later. And whatever pictures are viewable to the public from this weekend.

Now I must prepare to leave work at 3pm, because I have things to do before the 2.5 hour drive to THE PARTY CABIN.

One would think that a drink called “Fruit Loops” is a bad idea and you would probably be right. However, I seemed to think it would go well with pad thai last night – and it did. It just didn’t go so well with the three beers and slippery nipple afterwards. You really haven’t lived until you can convince the waiter to do a slippery nipple shot with us, just so we can have the privilege of ordering a bakers’ dozen of them.

And where else could I hang out on the roof top of a seafood restaurant in the trendiest part of Minneapolis holding my own gun show with my ripped biceps and arm wrestling the birthday girl?

Acting out our favorite scenes in “Little People, Big World”, trying to get 86’ed from dodgeball.com, and sharing tender moments under the stars with several of the most awesome people I know pretty much makes for a complete evening.

We continue Jenni’s birthday celebration by heading to a cabin “up north” for the weekend. I now feel like a true Minnesotan since I’m “heading north” on a Friday night. No internet access and no cell phone signals for a whole weekend? Someone will probably die.

Yesterday, I ate like a maniac. We’re talking breakfast, lunch, a dinner I used the oven to make, and even a couple of snacky-type things in between. Total caloric intake: 1673. I think the 100+ ounces of water I poured down my throat satisfied the typical hunger cravings I usually have. 1673 calories and I was full from the time I woke up until the time I went to bed.

What’s significant about 1673 calories? I have no idea. I just know that every formula I could find on the internet says to maintain my body weight I should be consuming a total of 3000+ calories. Um, yeah, no thanks. The thought of that, now that I’m more aware of what I’m eating, makes me sick to my stomach.

In order to lose one pound of fat per week, I have to reduce my weekly calorie intake by 3,500 calories, which works out at five hundred calories per day. This equation makes it so easy for me to see that I can easily lose weight by eating like a normal human being and not a starving animal that throws anything even remotely resembling food into her mouth. Or alternately, I stop drinking 3 cans of pop per day (which I’ve done) and there go my extra 3500 calories. Scary, isn’t it?
To lose weight, I obviously have to burn off more calories than I shove in my mouth. That doesn’t mean I use the crosstrainer for two hours straight to work off that many calories. It means I burn at least 500 doing cardio, a couple more hundred doing weights, and then my normal daily activities of walking up and down the stairs five or six times a day at my apartment, walking my dog, and some general cleaning take care of the rest of the calories that my body doesn’t need to actually run.

So, logically and on paper, this whole diet and health thing makes a lot of sense. It’s the following through with it that could get tricky!

Let’s talk about movies I’ve seen recently, because there have been quite a few. In the past two weeks, I’ve watched the following:

Rules of Attraction – Kaye let me borrow it months ago and I just now got around to watching it. It was good! Jacked up, but good, and really, that’s what I like about movies. At first, I had a hard time accepting Dawon from “Dawson’s Creek” in his asshole role and Boone from “Lost in the role of a gay boy who wants to have sex with Dawson. It’s what I always dreamed college would be like. You know, if I ever went. Parties, drugs, sex, and hardly any focus on actually going to class. My rating? **** (4/5 stars)

TransAmerica - I bought this movie, because I didn’t want to wait for it to get to me via Netflix. I’m glad I did. It was a great movie. Felicity Huffman is my favorite on Desperate Housewives and I thought she did a phenomenal job in this particular role The kid that played Toby (Kevin Zegers) was equally as phenomenal; it’s a huge jump from his past role as the main kid on the Air Bud movies. Obviously the movie deals with things like acceptance and gender dysphoria, but it’s not as depressing as it sounds. My rating? ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ (4/5 hearts, because they’re cute.)

In the Mix - Holy Usher. I won’t lie. I asked the good folks at Netflix to send this to me as soon as it came out. While I wouldn’t pay $8.50 at a theater to see Usher in a movie, I have no problem watching him on DVD at home. And I’m glad I did. The acting? Horrible. The story? Lame. Usher? HOT. Usher is a DJ/wannabe-record-producer who turns into the bodyguard of the girl he has a huge crush on, thanks to her mob boss dad. Are you seeing the lameness yet? My rating? ♣ (1/5 clubs, get it? Because Usher was a DJ in the club? I’m awesome.)

Let’s take a moment and reflect as my favorite catcher Joe Mauer leads the league in batting average after going 4/4 against the Mariners last night.

We Twins fans have to take what we can get since apparently winning frequently isn’t allowed so far this year.

Because of the Twins and their struggle to get some wins on their side, Joe Mauer isn’t doing so hot in the All-Star voting. One of the best defensive catchers in the league AND the most consistent player behind the plate (according to percentages!) should surely be ranked more than #5 among American League catchers, wouldn’t you think?

This whole get into better shape and lose weight and feel good all the time thing isn’t as easy as I make it look. Haha.

I did 35 minutes on the crosstrainer tonight at the gym. That’s more than I’ve done in a while. I started out doing 15 minutes, but as Wife Swap got more and more interesting, I kept bumping up the time three minutes here and five minutes here. 3.01 miles later, I’d apparently burned off 500 calories. Hell yes, I say.

Today, while on a phone call at work, I was flexing my biceps. Repeatedly. There’s nothing there that wasn’t there six month ago. I didn’t take measurements or anything like that. I should have and would if I could find a damn measuring tape. Instead, I just look at my arms intermittently throughout the day and wonder how I’m going to find polo shirts that don’t cut off my circulation because of my bulging biceps.

The thing is, I love lifting weights. It’s mainly due to My Gym Buddyâ„¢ doing it with me all the time and teaching me the proper way to do everything, but I can’t thank him enough for it. Not only do I feel like a bad ass WWF wrestler when I’m done, I’m starting to see the non-aesthetic results.

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This isn’t official or anything, but I’m pretty sure Rosie O’Donnell took this picture just for me.

I mean, who doesn’t see the number two and think “I love Wendy and twodolla.org!”?

• After our garage sale this weekend and a few other donations, Team Boobylicious has raised $22,075 towards our $30K goal. At last check, we were 12th out of 300+ teams in fundraising and #4 in per member donations. Yes, we’re awesome. I’m $85 from my $2500 goal. Super awesome.
• Went for a walk with Jenny Friday night in Minneapolis. We took our cameras, because that is what we do! Here are the pictures.
• I spent over an hour at the gym yesterday by myself, split between the recumbent bike and the crosstrainer. I kept thinking I was tired, but then remembered that I was at the gym for a reason, so I kept adding a two or three more minutes as time ran down. It felt awesome.
• I hate the President. My head started throbbing when I read parts of his bullshit radio address where he tries to justify the constitutional amendment that would ban same-sex marriages. It makes me want to never marry someone of the opposite sex intentionally, just because.
• Maybe my head is throbbing because I haven’t had any caffeine since Saturday night.
• FitDay.com? Probably my new best friend for a while, assuming I’ll stick with updating it and not abandon it like I do everything else in my life.
• I’m camping this weekend. And by camping, I mean staying in a cabin. It’s my first vacation-type thing that hasn’t involved crashing at someone else’s house who just happens to be in the town I’m visiting. I’M REALLY EXCITED. I’m in charge of jello shots so far. I knew that talent would come in handy!
• Little Riley FancyPants had his professional photo shoot Saturday afternoon. He was super hot, so he was panting the whole time. All but about 3 of his pictures were with his mouth wide open. I should have copies of some sort in three weeks. Expect great cuteness.