why uncle buck is one of the greatest movies of all time

Last night after my family finished watching Forrest Gump on ABC Family for the 5 millionth time, Uncle Buck came on. Amelia and I both remembered watching it when we were kids, so you’re darn skippy we were going to subject our almost 17 year old to it as well. Why? Because it’s possibly one of the greatest movies of all time and I wasn’t reminded of that until last night. The deal-maker was when it made my surly teenager actually LOL.

Buck1
For starters, the cast.

  • John Candy: If you don’t love John Candy, I don’t love you. Uncle Buck was right smack in the middle of his career and he’s perfect as the occasionally drunk uncle who makes a living illegally betting on horse races in ways that aren’t exactly legit.
  • Jean Louisa Kelly: She plays the surly teenage girl that all John Hughes movies have. Later, she went on to star as the teenage trollop in Mr. Holland’s Opus.
  • Macaulay Culkin: C’mon, it was before he got all hyped up in Home Alone, starred in Michael Jackson’s music videos and got arrested on drug charges.
  • LAURIE METCALF: Starring as Marcie Dahlgren-Frost. “Dahlgren is my maiden name, Frost is my married name. I’m single again, but I never bothered to remove the frost. And I get compliments on the hyphen.”
  • Pooter the Clown: It doesn’t matter who that was, because every movie should have someone in it named POOTER. However, this actor did go on to play roles such as Usher (not the Raymond variety), John (three times), Angry Bar Guy, Cop, Cabbie, Male Hostage #2, Janitor, Stalker, Beat Cop, Mugger, Bum #3, Man #1,Rude Dinner Patron, and most recognizably, one of the bad guys on Dumb and Dumber. Dreams do come true when you start your career as POOTER THE CLOWN.
  • That’s pretty much it. The actors that play the mom and dad? They don’t even have Wikipedias. That says a lot… except I don’t have Wikipedia.

For seconds, the hilarity!

  • Uncle Buck’s car backfires so loud that it scares people into thinking someone’s shooting up the school. That was funny in 1989! (True story: the sound was created using a gun shot and a firecracker.)
  • He threatens his niece’s boyfriend (named Bug, of course!) with a hatchet.
  • He also threatens Bug with a ritual killing.
  • He threatens to shave his oldest niece’s head while she sleeps if she doesn’t go bowling with him.
  • He talks dirty to a washing machine and almost gets maced by Jackie from Roseanne in the process.
  • He offers the elementary school principal to take a quarter and go have a rat gnaw the mole off her face. THAT’S HILARIOUS.

Listen, in on way, shape or form is this post sponsored. I mean, who the hell would sponsor it? I just find it important that everyone go watch Uncle Buck right now. Or The Great Outdoors. Or Cool Runnings.

 

 

honky wanted a fistful of my balls

  • Between last night and this morning, I upgraded to WordPress 2.7 and also designed to change things up with a different theme, especially since Design Disease had a new one out.  The only thing that seems to have gone wrong with the new WP installation is not being able to toggle back and forth between the Visual view and HTML view when writing a post. That kinda irritates me, but until I figure out a fix, I’m gonna try out a plugin called Dean’s FCKEditor and see how that goes. If my memory serves me correctly, I’ve tried this plugin out before and kind of hated it. Knowing WordPress, I’ll have to updated to 2.7.1 in about a week anyway…
  • We made another trip to my storage unit in the western suburbs to clean that damn thing out. This was the second car load of shit that we’ve brought back in hopes of eventually emptying it out and not having to pay $51/month for someone else to store shit I don’t need.
  • We went to go see Role Models last night. Since we saw it at the Riverview, we spent less than $15 for two movie tickets, a large popcorn, a large pop, and some Milk Duds. I figure the Riverview is the best place to take The General to see movies, because for that much money you can at least sit and enjoy the best popcorn in all of Minneapolis. Role Models was wrong in so many ways that it just had to be right. I laughed so hard that I had to come home and see what some of the lines were that I missed. Example: "Me and the judge have a special relationship… I don’t wanna get too graphic but I sucked his dick for drugs." That’s good humor, right there.

 

 

watch me make this pencil disappear

The General and I went to go see The Dark Knight tonight. I wanted to see it last weekend, but I also didn’t want to end up punching myself in the face repeatedly by trying to fight crowds like that. Another advantage of working downtown is the most awesome convenience of being able to walk a few blocks to the theater after work and not have to deal with parking!

The movie? Fantastic. So fantastic. Heath Ledger, just like every site on the internet has said already, was amazing. After his first scene, I leaned over to The General and was pretty much speechless; all I could mumble out was “Holy crap. He’s amazing.” or something equally as lame. There wasn’t a single part about the movie I didn’t like. While I’d heard from several people that it was about 30 minutes too long, I didn’t think so at all. Most 2.5 hour movies tend to make me restless, but the only squirming around I did was when I couldn’t wait to see what was next or when the asshole thug that smelled like cheap booze had to walk in front of us at least a half dozen times.

Sadly, my scene got cut.

taken by jenni

Jenni took this picture of me last July when they were filming The Dark Knight while we were in Chicago. Matt, Jenni, Bill, and I were wondering around downtown Chicago and noticed production vans all over the place with signs talking about RFK/Rory’s First Kiss. A production assistant kicked us off the set and told us we should google Rory’s First Kiss since none of us knew what it was, but what that douchebag production assistant didn’t know is that the security guard a block down had already told us they were filming the new Batman movie.

There goes my plans for royalties and getting rich off DVD sales.