I’m Wendy and here’s a timeline. It’s riveting.

  • 1978: Pisces: Born in Sedalia, Missouri. Adopted by my amazing parents
  • 1982: Got in trouble by my preschool teacher for not using the white crayon to color something that was already on white paper
  • 1984: Got sent to the principal’s office in 1st grade for writing “shit balls” on a piece of paper
  • 1985: Spent most of 2nd grade standing in the corner for talking too much and my grandpa died. He put boobs on a snowman once and I got really mad at him. He also never let me win at checkers.
  • 1986 – 1995: Typical kid life, with some traveling, speech and debate, softball, basketball, marching band and working at Taco Bell.
  • 1996: Graduated high school from Smith Cotton High School. Go Tigers. Watched a lot of NBA. Michael Jordan for life. Went to college at Central Methodist College for two weeks. Dropped out.
  • 1997 – 2001 Worked a few jobs, took a few college classes, met some great people, started to get a little itchy living in a small town for the rest of my life
  • 2002: Moved to St. Paul, MN. Started working at a telecommunication company that went bankrupt three months after I started and I got to watch their furniture get repossessed. Started working in a Best Buy call center. Also worked at Budget Rent-A-Car for six hours, but I didn’t like it.
  • 2003: Got hired at a software company by one of the best bosses I’ve ever had. My grandma died. She’s one of the best people I’ve ever known and I want to be that same kind of person.
  • 2004 – 2012:  Finally became comfortable with who I am. Met some terrific friends. Traveled. Got my first dog – a white boxer named Riley. Got fired from the software company because I wasn’t great at sales. Moved to Minneapolis in my very own apartment. Randomly landed an HR gig at a staffing agency. Met my wife-to-be. Adopted a cat – a butt(erscotch) tabby with a broken nose named Marshall. Jumped off the top of the Stratosphere. Got engaged in Vegas. Got another dog – a neurotic mutt named June.
  • 2013: Started working at a federal credit union. Made a return to college. Got married.
  • 2014: Graduated with my Associate’s Degree. Had a baby.
  • 2015: Bought a house in West St. Paul.
  • 2016: My dog died. I got a promotion into middle management. I graduated with my Bachelor’s degree.


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