why uncle buck is one of the greatest movies of all time

Last night after my family finished watching Forrest Gump on ABC Family for the 5 millionth time, Uncle Buck came on. Amelia and I both remembered watching it when we were kids, so you’re darn skippy we were going to subject our almost 17 year old to it as well. Why? Because it’s possibly one of the greatest movies of all time and I wasn’t reminded of that until last night. The deal-maker was when it made my surly teenager actually LOL.

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For starters, the cast.

  • John Candy: If you don’t love John Candy, I don’t love you. Uncle Buck was right smack in the middle of his career and he’s perfect as the occasionally drunk uncle who makes a living illegally betting on horse races in ways that aren’t exactly legit.
  • Jean Louisa Kelly: She plays the surly teenage girl that all John Hughes movies have. Later, she went on to star as the teenage trollop in Mr. Holland’s Opus.
  • Macaulay Culkin: C’mon, it was before he got all hyped up in Home Alone, starred in Michael Jackson’s music videos and got arrested on drug charges.
  • LAURIE METCALF: Starring as Marcie Dahlgren-Frost. “Dahlgren is my maiden name, Frost is my married name. I’m single again, but I never bothered to remove the frost. And I get compliments on the hyphen.”
  • Pooter the Clown: It doesn’t matter who that was, because every movie should have someone in it named POOTER. However, this actor did go on to play roles such as Usher (not the Raymond variety), John (three times), Angry Bar Guy, Cop, Cabbie, Male Hostage #2, Janitor, Stalker, Beat Cop, Mugger, Bum #3, Man #1,Rude Dinner Patron, and most recognizably, one of the bad guys on Dumb and Dumber. Dreams do come true when you start your career as POOTER THE CLOWN.
  • That’s pretty much it. The actors that play the mom and dad? They don’t even have Wikipedias. That says a lot… except I don’t have Wikipedia.

For seconds, the hilarity!

  • Uncle Buck’s car backfires so loud that it scares people into thinking someone’s shooting up the school. That was funny in 1989! (True story: the sound was created using a gun shot and a firecracker.)
  • He threatens his niece’s boyfriend (named Bug, of course!) with a hatchet.
  • He also threatens Bug with a ritual killing.
  • He threatens to shave his oldest niece’s head while she sleeps if she doesn’t go bowling with him.
  • He talks dirty to a washing machine and almost gets maced by Jackie from Roseanne in the process.
  • He offers the elementary school principal to take a quarter and go have a rat gnaw the mole off her face. THAT’S HILARIOUS.

Listen, in on way, shape or form is this post sponsored. I mean, who the hell would sponsor it? I just find it important that everyone go watch Uncle Buck right now. Or The Great Outdoors. Or Cool Runnings.