comcast tried to sell something to my husband last night

Our internet wasn’t working last night and when you live in a house full of internet geeks, that’s not really a good thing. We did the standard things we knew the Comcast person would already ask us to do – power cycle the modem, power cycle the router, remove the router from the situation, plug the computer right into the modem, blah, blah, blah. Then I called to find out what the h was going on.

(Note: I wish I could remember the person’s name that I talked to, mainly so I could just use it instead of saying Comcast Lady, because you know how much I like personalizing things.)

First off, they didn’t have our new address in the system, which is weird considering we’ve been there for 2+ months and haven’t had any trouble getting our service or our bills from them. Once we got that taken care of, we started troubleshooting our internet. No, I didn’t get an error message when I tried to connect, it just doesn’t connect. Finally, Comcast Lady decides to reboot the signal to our modem and of course that takes a while, which results in awkward conversation.

Comcast Lady: How are the rest of your Comcast services doing tonight?

Me: Just fine, thank you.

Comcast Lady: You know, if your husband is a sports fan, he can use your username and password to see over BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. (I couldn’t hear the rest of what she was saying because my brain was in the process of exploding and leaking slowly out of my ears.)

Me: Well, I actually don’t have a husband because I am a gay and I have a partner, so yeah.

Comcast Lady: Oh, I’m sorry, well, if your partner likes sports BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

Anger Point #1) It’s 2012. There are so many things wrong with assuming a woman calling has a husband. Period.

Anger Point #2) It’s 2012. WOMEN LIKE SPORTS.

Comcast, you sons of bitches. I want to quit you so bad, but I can’t because I rent and I need my high speed internet. You have sucked me in like the corporate conglomerate you are, so you could at the very least have your customer service representatives go through a little bit of sensitivity training, you know?

A lady that love some sports, has no husband, and is a gay.


  1. d

    funny stuff… I dislike comcast…

    but after re-reading the post, sounds like comcast lady was trying to let you know that someone besides yourself can use your username to access (whatever floats your boat). In this case sports and in the case the example second user was a husband.

    so to play a little mad lips:

    C.L.: you know if your imaginary friend is a quilting fan, they can use your username and password to see over blah blah blah…


  2. Yes, it was wrong of her to assume you had a husband, or that you didn’t like sports. But give the poor lady a break – if comcast is anything like where I work (and it sounds EXACTLY like where I work), then this poor lady who thought she was taking a tech support job is now being forced to do sales, which she may or may not be qualified for. Not only is she forced to do something she’s not qualified for, she has to sell to someone who didn’t come to her for a sale, they came to her with a support problem. So she’s in the unfortunate position of selling something to someone who doesn’t want it even though she’s not a “seller”, or she risks losing her job. It’s a very awkward position; I know from CURRENT experience.
    So, if she’s not a “seller”, then I’m sure Comcast has provided her with little scripts to say during silences so that she can drive sales. So, it may have been less of a case of “I’m assuming she has a husband” and more of a case of “Oh fuck, I’ve got to try to sell to this woman now… I’m not good at this; I’d better use their script”.
    So, I know she shouldn’t have assumed anything, but give her a break. We don’t know her situation, she could be just trying to keep a job.

  3. And trust me… WE HATE SELLING. But my company did the same thing to us. I had a pure tech support position. In the last year, they’ve given us some training, and now are forcing us to sell ON EVERY CALL. Oh, and by the way? No extra pay. An additional job, with no additional benefits. Do you know how soul-crushing it is to have to sell to people who just want your help? Especially when they’re elderly? And then when you question the policy, you get “Well, you’re lucky to have a job.”? It’s a miracle I haven’t killed myself or gone postal. Seriously.

  4. fredklein

    Shouldn’t that be “Comcast, you sons and/or daughters of bitches”?

    Can’t be sexist now…

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