Using Jodi’s logic, and a fair logic it is, I haven’t went to bed yet, so this still counts as posting on the 13th. And yes, I’m backdating it just like she did, dammit.
Here’s the thing. I couldn’t go to bed before watching the equivalent of a freight train loaded with little puppies smashing head on with an AmTrak full of adorable preschoolers, A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila. For those of you that don’t have this programmed into your Tivo or watch it online in its entirety, you clearly have better things to do with your time. And I’ll explain it to you.
Tila (you should read her bio) is apparently some Internet phenom that has eleventy billion MySpace friends and was an online Playboy model. At least that’s what I hear. Up until the airing of aforementioned show, nobody knew this little secret about her, except for the producers at MTV. What secret was that? I’m glad you asked. Tila, in her words, is "a bisexual". The folks at MTV gathered up 16 very straight guys and 16 lesbians, each of them having no clue that they’d be competing against one another. Once they’re introduced, they’re led into a mansion and told they all get to share one bed. I’ll let you process this.
There’s 10 episodes. Number 6, appropriately called "The Cat Fight" aired tonight. I usually feel like showering after the show, and tonight, I may need to do so twice.
While I would love to tell you all about each episode, I honestly don’t feel like I could do it justice.
Tonight’s challenge, tonight, involved eating "weird foods" because Tila is a "world traveler" and doesn’t always get to choose what she wants to eat. They had to eat a bull wang and it’s testicles. The very, very, very straight guys all had comments about putting penis in their mouth; the lesbians all had comments about putting penis in their mouth. And of course a dude’s going to win a challenge like that. His reward? A champagne bath with Tila in a very large champagne glass, filled with champagne. NO, SERIOUSLY.
Afterwards, they each had to make her a dessert. The guy from Italy made something involving peanut butter and chocolate, and then sprinkled Cream of Tartar on the top, because he thought it was something like powedered sugar, I’m guessing.
It’s high class entertainment, and holy God, if you’re not watching it, just do it now. It’ll change your life forever. (That last statement may have been a lie.)