ai: it starts with the top 12 boys

The two-hour long American Idol fest begins tonight. It’s that time of season where we see way too much of Ryan Seacrest or Secrest or Secrete or however you spell his last name and a Coke commercial every 10 minutes. It’s also that time of season where I spend two nights a week blogging about the show. Hey, I need something to keep me busy until baseball season starts up, right?

Tonight, the 12 boys start off, and really, I can only remember the auditions of a few. Without a doubt, though, I’m sure we’ll see a recap of every single damn contestant for the next however many weeks this show goes on. And I’ll bitch about it, but I’ll watch it. Every week. And then I’ll write about it. Because that’s the kind of awesome life I have.

Your comment and opinions are always welcome!

Rudy Cardenas – Free Ride – If nothing, you’ve gotta say he was super fun. We’ve seen so many seasons where someone is boring and they get voted off because of that, but this boy has everyone up and excited. The thing is, though, he won’t win. His name’s Rudy. That scrawny kid name has already been taken by a dream-come-true story.Paula, with no surprise, liked him, but Randy and Simon weren’t to impressed.

Brandon Rogers – Rock With You – He’s cute and he has shiny white shoes, but I don’t love him yet. His whole background singing thing is going to end up biting him in the ass, because the judges will compare every little thing he does to his former background performance.

Yeah, so the judges kinda thought the same thing.

Sundance Head??? – I don’t like him. I didn’t like him in his auditions or Hollywood or anything, and his chest hair is kind of oozing out over the top of his shirt. Distracting, Mr. Head, very distracting. I don’t even know what song it was and it was kinda weird.

Randy misses his old vibe, Paula didn’t like his song choice, and Simon thinks he’s steadily gone downhill. Ouch.

Paul Kim – Careless Whisper – Ah, the dude that’s making “no shoes” his statement. Nice. I hope he’s had his tetanus shot. I’m thinking he’s kind of boring, and by kind of, I mean a lot. If he wants to sing George Michael, he should pick something a little different and something that he can really nail.

Randy likes his potential, Paula says he oversang it and calls him pitchy, and Simon tells him to put his shoes on for next week. I kind of thought he’d say something about that!

Chris Richardson – I Don’t Wanna Be – Bo Bice did this two years ago and thanks to him Gavin DeGraw’s original version got played more on the radio. I don’t really know that this was a good choice for ol’ boy here, but he’s doing an awesome job of making it his own. And now I like him even more then I did when I thought he just looked like Justin Timberlake.

Randy and Paula were both impressed with him making the song his own. Simon thought it was below his standards, but thinks the girls are going to vote for him anyway.

Nick Pedro – Now and Forever – He managed to bring the tears in his very first interview. Pussy. I mean, awww. He’s kind of boring really. Pretty, but boring, and that’s really all I can say about his whole performance. Then, he tells people to Vote for Pedro. Cute.
All three judges don’t love him as much as they did in his first audition.

Blake Lewis – Somewhere Only We Know – I love that he beat boxes and I would vote for him if that’s all he did every week. I’m in love with this boy for reasons I can’t explain. He sounds pretty and he looks pretty. I can’t wait for Beatbox Week.
Randy, Paula, and Simon all liked him. Randy missed the beatbox, and that’s why Randy’s my dawg.

Sanjaya Malakar – Knocks Me Off My Feet – I kind of want to adopt this little boy. He’s freaking adorable and that smile is precious as can be. I think maybe his sister is trying to sabotage him by picking this song. Sadly, it wasn’t good. At all.

Randy complains about him picking a Stevie Wonder song and not being up for it, but he picked Stevie Wonder in his audition and the judges all thought the was great. Paula kind of agreed, and Simon calls it the dreariest performance yet. I feel like I’ve watched this show for too long, because I can tell you everything Simon’s going to pinpoint or make fun of.

Chris Sligh – Typical – I’d never heard this song, but if I didn’t know the premise of this show, I’d almost guess this dude was the original artist of the song. He’s great.

Paula and Randy both really liked him. Simon just rambles, because he doesn’t like Chris’ singing, but he likes his personality. And then Simon calls Ryan sweetheart, which makes Ryan very uncomfortable, and that in turn makes me laugh.

Jared Cotter – Back at One – I don’t remember him from the first billion audition episodes. He’s really good, but the judges will probably say something about him mimicking Brian McKnight instead of making the song his own… even though he sounds just as good as Brian McKnight.

The judges aren’t completely impressed with him. They all like him, but don’t think it was a good song choice. Simon says he looks good. Hot.

A.J. Tabaldo – Never Too Much – I don’t remember him either, from this season, or the four times he’s auditioned before. I’m too distracted by the popped collar on his polo shirt to pay attention to his song. I wasn’t really into his performance, really at all.

Simon calls it a theme park performance and predictable. Randy thought it was good and Paula think he should pick a more challenging song.

Phil Stacy – I Could Not Ask For More – This is the guy that missed the birth of his kid while he was auditioning. His wife is precious, which is enough to distract me from his shiny head. At the end, I swear he said “I could not axe for more”.

Randy says it was the best performance of the night, to which Paula nearly agrees. Simon finally says it was good enough for tonight.

Who’s going home? In my perfect world, it’d be Sundance Head and Nick Pedro.

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