This long. But it’s worth the read, if you haven’t heard about it already. It may be a chapter in my upcoming memoir, “My Secret Life in Santiago”.

Yesterday morning, Jenni sent me a link to an ad on craigslist, which just happened to be listed under the “Missed Connections” part of the site. I’ve looked at those ads before, and usually it’s the patient who loves her doctor:

Dave G. - ER Doctor at Fairview - w4m
Doc, what a shame we didn’t talk longer. I would love to be your patient any day.

or the girl in the black sweater who may have possibly found her soul mate in a Barnes & Noble over lunch today:

Minnetonka Barnes & Noble -lunch today. - w4m - 38
To the gorgeous guy that I saw at Barnes & Noble in Mtka. today. Are you single?
Girl in black sweater..

Can you see how they’re not really something I really become interested in for too long at a time?

The ad that Jenni sent, though, was even better:

you were cute with your ‘boot’ - m4w - 28
hobbling along in downtown minneapolis, hope you find this

Guess who was hobbling along in downtown Minneapolis Friday night with a ‘boot’? Yours truly.

I thought about whether or not I should respond for a good portion of the day, but then decided to do it. What could it really hurt, right?

Email from me: I’m not sure if it was me that you saw. I don’t really call it hobbling, but more of a injury-induced swagger! In any case, it could be me. When did you see this gimp and where was she walking? It’s a quiz!

Email from him: I don’t even recall, I just saw you very quickly in passing, I believe I was near City Center? I’m new to the area, and I get lost in the skyways, do you have a picture? I have a picture if you would like to exchange, hope it’s you!

Email from me: probably wasn’t me then! i was around the metrodome/kieran’s on friday night.

Email from him: it was you! here my pic is attached, had to be you, i took off to murphy’s and that direction friday night myself…i work in city center, but went out for the twins game fri. night, here my picture is attached, got a pic worth a shot at least? what did you do to yourself anyways??? off to watch the vikings game check back later….

Except, you see, I don’t think there’s any reason for him to be checking back later.

I didn’t check email last night after I finished watching the Twins game, and the two Monday Night Football games. But by the time I woke up this morning and checked the ol’ Gmail account, there were three more messages from him waiting for me. He was asking for another picture, telling me good night, and wishing me a good day. Considerate, yes, but overbearing? Slightly.

I spent sometime this morning Googling his email address, and I’m glad I did. Turns out, he posts quite often to communities and comments on pictures that involve casts. Frequently. He’ll ask for more pictures or ask why they’re in a cast, etc. You get the idea. It’s not sounding so healthy, is it?

This was the latest email I got from him:

Well, let me know if we are forever going to be a missed connection, I guess you got the email, anyways, I’m stuck in training all day today, no sunshine anyway :( I’m ready to go home! Hope your having a good day

Besides the fact that he said “your” instead of “you’re”, I’m really not down with the cast fetish. Regretfully, I think we’ll have to stay a Missed Connection forever.