the escape’s biggest milestone ever

It only took me five years, four months, and 17 days, but I finally did it. I put 100,000 miles on my 2001 Ford Escape this morning on the way to work.


It’s been through a lot with me.

  • two speeding tickets in Missouri
  • one speeding ticket in Iowa
  • two parking tickets in Minnesota
  • one trip to the impound lot
  • two wrecks
  • three tows
  • 33 oil changes
  • two new sets of tires
  • 0 trips to the shop for any kind of repair that I didn’t directly cause

I put all but about 350 miles on it, and those 350 miles only came because I made the dealership find a red one, which they had to drive from Little Rock, AR, to Sedalia, MO, just to make me happy. But that was only after I threatened to come back and get my down payment when the car salesman (and owner of the dealership) tried to throw me a line of shit.

It’s been with me for five jobs, two states, five addresses, eight roommates, two broken hearts, a broken foot, and a new puppy. If I had all my archives up, I’m sure there’s even mention of me buying it – yes, two dolla’s been around for a good seven years now.

It’s driven all over the state of Missouri and part of Kansas. It can drive from Minnesota to Missouri or the Twin Cities to Milwaukee on auto-pilot. It’s ran over a possum, two raccoons, and a very large turkey. It’s smelled like spilled gasoline, fast-food, rotten lettuce, and currently a very large pine forest.

It’s completely paid for. It’s mine. And now, since it’s made it past the 100K mark, I think it needs a name.


  1. PeeWee said:

    I am more impressed that you took a picture while driving 40mph!

    August 30, 2006
  2. said:

    isabelle names everything henry. So maybe you should call it Henry.

    August 30, 2006
  3. said:

    I can’t remember the last vehicle I had that had less than 100,000. The brown pick-up had something like 279,000 on it when I sold it. HA HA. I love old shit!

    August 30, 2006
  4. said:

    Holy crap — your car should last to 300,000 miles with all those oil changes! :D And aren’t paid-off cars the best? I don’t see why anyone leases!

    August 31, 2006
  5. said:


    And then you need to trademark it.

    September 2, 2006

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