What makes my dog more awesome than yours?
Probably the fact that he takes his food and water bowls out of their containers and repeatedly bangs them against my leg until I do something with them. What he hasn’t learned is that he doesn’t get food at 11:30 PM no matter how cute and/or persistent he might be.
If he eats now, he shits four hours later. I am not getting up at 3:30 AM because someone wanted a midnight snack.
This is why I don’t have kids yet. That, and you can’t throw a kid in a kennel when you go to work during the day either. Dogs have their advantages.